Tag Archives: food

BEST OF 2013: a limited perspective

         My view of 2013 was fairly limited as, in all honesty, I really don’t get out much and when I do get out, it usually revolves around the interest of the kids instead of my own.  That said, however, I still had some pretty good experiences in 2013 so I thought it’s only proper that I compile a list and throw it into the pit of countless other mediocre “best of” lists.   Here we go, get ready to have your mind BLOWN.

Movie of the Year:  DESPICABLE ME 2 
minionThis seems to be a popular category, so lets start with that.  I didn’t make it out to the theater much this year and much of what I watched on TV was a mix of fairly unbearable children’s programing courtesy of Netflix.  I did, however really love this movie.  Very enjoyable for absolutely all ages without pandering to any.
Qualifier: I believe I only saw one movie released in 2013 that had actual “real” people, therefore Sharknado scores an honorable mention.

Game of the Year:  TOMB RAIDER
tombI actually played quite a few games in 2013, though very few that were actually released in 2013. Had I played everything, though, I’m quite confident Tomb Raider would still be in my top 5 at least, as it was a fantastic game.  It had everything I love in a game, story, adventure, collecting, and, of course, brutal cut scenes.
Qualifier: I have yet to play what apparently the rest of the world has determined as the 2013 game of the year, so until I play The Last of Us, feel free to add an asterix by my pick.

Book of the Year:  MOON DUST CASTLES
mdcSeriously, what did you expect me to put here? But what isn’t to love about this book? Not one but four…FOUR stories, fantastic writing, unrivaled cover art, great illustrations (aw shucks), you’ll laugh, you’ll cry…you’ll buy it hopefully.
Qualifier: I may or may not have had a hand in the creation of this book and the aforementioned illustrations and cover art…plus, I may or may not have seen the author sans clothing.

Now the lightning round…
Album of the year –  SUPERCHUNK: I Hate Music
Song of the Year – COME ON EILEEN
(31st straight year)
Phrase of the Year – MY BRAIN IS GREEN -Noah
Drink of the Year – COFFEE
Website of the Year – MINE
Meal of the Year – STEAK GORGONZOLA ALFREDO
Natural Disaster of the Year – MILEY CYRUS
(I’ll spare you an image)
Best Gift of the Year – THIS THING…

IMG_4338Yeah, it’s a light up Thomas Kinkade wall tapestry.

Watermelon Oreos: tasty treat or artificial abomination?

Why has no one thought of combining a shortbread cookie with artificial watermelon flavoring before now?  Because it sounds awful, that’s why.  With such a large variety of Oreo flavors, the only people I can imagine actually choosing these would be a hyperactive 8 year old or someone who is way too high to be grocery shopping responsibly.  Regardless, I made the purchase.

IMG_2558

I was expecting to be hit with an overpowering scent of artificial watermelon when I tore open the bag, but to my surprise, the smell was hardly noticeable.  They were lined up in neat little rows like all good little Oreos are, just waiting for someone to ham-fist their way through their numbers.  IMG_2559Now we come to the moment of truth, the tasting.  I take a gentle smell of the individual cookie  to take in the subtle scent of shortbread with a hint of watermelon.  An odd mix, but we knew that already.  First bite nets me a punch in the mouth from that overly sweet chemical watermelon flavor familiar to anyone who’s ever had a sugar binge of Laffy Taffy or Jolly Ranchers.  The shortbread cookie flavor is barely recognizable, serving merely as a vehicle for that sickeningly sweet green and pink cream.   It’s edible, but it is in no way subtle.  IMG_2561I polish off the first cookie, then proceed to eat another to see if it’s any better when knowing what to expect, much like allowing your eyes to adjust to a bright light.  The punch in the mouth is less severe the second time allowing me to experience the nuances of the concentrated artificial flavor…of which there are none.  This cookie is basically Oogh the caveman beating me over the head with tree stump chanting “WA-TER-MEL-LON”. I want to stop, but know I must forge ahead in order to give a full review, therefore I proceed to the milk-dunking test.  IMG_2562

I give the little flavor demon a 5 second dip into a glass of cold skim milk and take a bite.  The milk does help to disperse the spastic flavor trauma of the watermelon and gives a bit more help to the overwhelmed shortbread cookie.  This helps to nudge it up the edibility ladder a bit more, but not enough to garner a recommendation . IMG_2565

As I mentioned before, there are many options when it comes to Oreos, or cookies in general.  I would suggest giving it a bit more consideration before dropping your $3 on a package of these artificial disaster snacks.  Yes, there are far worse things you could eat, but the question is, why would you?