I returned home after dropping off my Mom, and as I got out of my car, I realized just how beautiful the night sky was. The layers of stars showed infinate depth that is rarely seen anymore. The swirling clouds created a vibrant foreground for this darkly illuminated image.
As I stared into the sky, I noticed the lingering taste of garlic bread in my mouth, left over from dinner. I must have been orally odorous throughout the evening’s entirety.
As I stood pondering this, I heard the faint sound of nearby marklebillys. It was a bit unsettling as it sounded like whispers and shuffling feet. In fear of being abruptly Ned Beatty’ed, I made my way into the house.
My first stop was the bathroom to brush my teeth and attempt to remove the garlic’s influence. As I picked up my toothbrush, it felt odd in my hand, as if it didn’t fit. I examined the brush and verified that it was indeed mine, then proceeded to brush. Odor reduced by 62%.
By this time, I was certain that my best course of action was to head directly to bed to put finality to the day and start a new chapter in life tomorrow. I then ingested my nightly sleep meds and challenged Thursday to a race. It won.
Overall, I would rate this experience 7 kernels of unpopped popcorn in 9 pints of partially hydrogenated butter substitute.